A Nursery Rhyme to Forget

If something odd, different or unexpected is going to happen, it is going to happen to me. They say what won’t kill you will make you stronger. I am not sure if someone is testing me, however if they are, I wish they would stop.

Saturday was a beautiful day and I decided to take my daughter for a walk in the stroller. As we were walking down the sidewalk next to the road singing, "Old McDonald Had A Farm, And On His Farm He Had A," well let’s just hope little Jordyn thought I said, Duck, rather than *uck, as I noticed a large Fox walking along the road a few hundred feet behind us an picking up speed.

Suddenly looking like I was one of those speed walking Mothers with the big wheeled strollers trying to get my exercise, I realized I had only a Blackberry to throw at the rabid Fox. Is that covered in my blackberry warranty?

I am now in a panic as to what to do and am picking up speed and so is the fox. I thought maybe I should take off my bright red shirt I was wearing and pitch it into the road then thought, “Mark, it’s a fox not a bull you idiot.”

Suddenly as I looked back and pondered my next move, a police car came darting up and “boom,” right over the fox, flipped his lights on, did a u turn and “boom,” back over the fox again. Then the officer stopped the car and got out with his gun drawn.

I turned around and said to the officer, “Thanks, great driving!” Nothing like running over the fox 6 times before shooting it to liven up the afternoon. I was fairly confident that fox wasn’t going to be biting me now. “Saw him coming after you, had to get him a second time, just to make sure I got him good," he said with a big grin. At least he didn’t ask me to stay and clean off the squad car…

Needless to say I am a little edgy about taking walks again. If you are driving through my neighborhood and see a guy pushing a stroller armed and in full military gear, you will know it is me.

As for Jordyn, I am just afraid when she gets to stories like the Big Bad Wolf and others where the evil character resembles the Fox, she is going to just say, “Well why didn’t they just run it over with the car?”